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ToBeWhatWeAre作文1200字

80分
2025-04-15 13:55:16

Everytime when we watch movies and dramas we're all trying to imitate those decorated role who are possessing good characters.On one hand,that's a really good way to educate ourselves,not only our personalities but our behaviours.On the other hand,sometimes the ones who duplicate the best part of that characters have shown what he or she wants to be.

But is it appropriate that we imitate them?Well,Studies show what we have got from them is actually superficial things which may influence our conducts,neverthless,inner thoughts inside our hearts can only change a little bit.Why is that happening?The reason is quite simple:our images are changing because of the unconsciously effects from people around us including the deceloping social interactions and most importantly,the sense we have about ourselves.You may think,"Then it seems difficult to shape our good statues!"The answer is obviously no.Think carefully about what kind of person you wanna be and take immediate actions to make sure that strong will deep inside your mind,you will find that this is what you truly are,who is one of the kind that no one can ever duplicate.

高三:路艳艳

写作思路解析

作者拥有不错感悟能力,能够从寻常事件提炼思考,搭配主旨鲜明的卒章显志点明写作意图拓展表达,素材寻常朴素,却能挖掘出悠长意蕴,小事件写出大感悟。普通人容易忽略的小事,在笔下生出独特感悟。很适合练习观察思考类写作。

本文范文仅作写作思路参考,请勿直接照搬抄袭用于作业投稿。

作文打分:80分(满分100)

作文优点

审题较为准确,能够快速抓住写作核心,素材选取贴合题意。段落划分规整,行文流畅,阅读体验舒适,写作基础扎实。

存在不足

!部分句子语序可以优化,行文流畅度还有提升空间。重点不够突出,多个内容平均分配篇幅,读者难以快速抓住文章核心主线。

改进建议

描写场景拒绝笼统概括,尽量还原具体动作、环境细节。写作过程把控节奏,避免部分段落过度拖沓。

综合点评

文章情感流露自然,依托亲身经历展开叙述,真实可信。逻辑链条完整,段落划分规范。构思偏向大众化,缺少专属自身的表达特色。

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