Avrli ?
LavigneI always needed time on my own?我真的需要一些独处的时间?I never thought I'd need you there when I cry?我从未期待当我哭泣时，你能陪在我身边?And the days feel like years when I'm alone?你不在的日子，我度日如年?And the bed where you lie is made up on your side?你睡过的床，没了你，不再温暖?When you walk away?当你离开时?I count the steps that you take?我默默地数着你留下的脚印?Do you see how much I need you right now??你知道我现在有多么需要你吗？?When you're gone?自从你离开后?The pieces of my heart are missing you?我那破碎的心就不停的想着你?When you're gone?自从你离开以后?The face I came to know is missing too?你那熟悉的面孔就总在我脑海里浮现?When you're gone?自从你离开后?The words I need to hear to always get me through the day And make it OK?我渴望听到你的声音，让我坚强的走过这段日子?I miss you?我想，我太思念你了?I haven't felt this way before?我从未有过这种感受?Everything that I do reminds me of you?我做的每件事都会让我想起你?And the clothes you left,they lie on the floor?你留下的衣服，还静静地躺在地上?And they smell just like you I love the things that you do?它们带着你的气味，让我回忆起你的一切?When you walk away?当你离开时?I count the steps that you take?我默默地数着你留下的脚印?Do you see how much I need you right now??你知道我现在有多么需要你吗？?When you're gone?自从你离开后?The pieces of my heart are missing you?我那破碎的心就不停的想着你?When you're gone?自从你离开以后?The face I came to know is missing too?你那熟悉的面孔就总在我脑海里浮现?When you're gone?自从你离开后?The words I need to hear to always get me through the day And make it OK?我渴望听到你的声音，让我坚强的走过这段日子?I miss you?我想，我太思念你了?We were made fo each other,out here forever,I know we were?我们为彼此而生，永远 ...
l love you ?.... ?Forever
初一:秋风
写作思路解析
充满生活气息，借体验饱满的视听结合调动多重感知描摹现实日常，观察视角细致入微，可以捕捉到多数人容易忽略的细微之处，极易唤起读者共鸣。取材普通人熟悉的生活场景，自带亲切感。文字温暖朴实，距离感弱，适合生活化题材写作参考。
本文范文仅作写作思路参考，请勿直接照搬抄袭用于作业投稿。
作文打分：87分（满分100）
作文优点
★擅长捕捉生活小事进行创作，素材随处可见，真实接地气。行文流畅连贯，段落跳转自然，很少出现生硬断层。
存在不足
!素材种类较为单一，仅仅依靠单个事例支撑全文，角度不够丰富。心理描写偏少，大多只记录外在行为，缺少人物内心活动刻画，人物形象不够立体饱满。
改进建议
↓描写人物时兼顾动作、神态、内心想法，多角度塑造形象。控制开篇铺垫篇幅，不要过多铺垫迟迟不进入核心事件。
综合点评
◆中心思想明确，全文紧紧围绕主题展开，段落排布有序，行文通顺流畅。擅长环境烘托写作，场景描写值得肯定。人物刻画较为单薄，动作、心理描写不足，人物形象不够立体丰满。